why do people strive on the fact that other people don’t? or why does seeing other people do well or better than them motivate people? that just seems weird to me… i find it really bizarre.
surely you should want to do well for yourself, rather than just wanting to be better than everyone else, it actually makes me feel quite sick.
my ‘friend’(i am currently using that term very loosely)/housemate keeps asking me if i’ve done any uni work and it’s really triggering me at the moment because i know that the only reason she does it is to make herself feel better about the amount of work she has or hasn’t done. especially with the state of mind i am in at the moment, i feel under so much pressure, i feel like my feelings aren’t valid, my depression/anxiety isn’t allowed right now because i can’t let go, i can’t let anything slip anymore than it already has because there is too much at stake and i can’t fuck up university again.
i don’t know how i’m supposed to tell her that her asking me that constantly is triggering for me… because i know shes just gonna think i’m fucking weird, i’m already locking myself in my room constantly because i can’t deal with having conversations or anything.
fuuuuuuuck seriously fuck fuckcnrhbvjb ghrbfdjnvjnejfnv fuck.